| Sent: | 18 December 2008 21:15:26 |
| To: | joyce.cockell@dsl.pipex.com; martyn.sanders@dsl.pipex.com |
Hello,
I am appealing to the Bishop of Winchester for help again.
Earlier this year I wrote with concerns regarding a Churchwarden and his wife,
this couple have hurt me very badly, the churchwarden by using sexuality on me as well as playing emotional games, and his wife by saying and shouting some terrible things, they have almost literally driven me mad, I am autistic and have behavioural problems, and because of what happened I am out of control and also very ill with disturbed sleep and nightmares, severe concentration problems, which led to a car crash which hasn't helped, and I am now unable to work, I am very very distressed.
My concerns that I sent to you were being handled by Jane Fisher, but I have just been told through another person that all that is being done is that the Churchwarden is being asked not to work with vulnerable people unsupervised.
I am astounded that this information was given to someone else, not me, am I mistaken, why did this happen?? Is this man really allowed to go on running a church after what he did to me? This evening he called me a liar in front of people, and tried to get people from a church that I have worshipped at since to be witnesses to me losing my temper, I am being criminalised for what this man did to me, yet he is representing God and the Church and I have lost my faith in God, which was my light and hope in the darkness of multiple disabilities and poverty, he abused me, the depth of the damage is hard to explain, but I prayed to God for a family to belong to, because I am disabled and alone, this man brought me into his family, told me that 'God had told him to take me as a daughter' and he regressed me so I was like a child, then he talked sex to me and did things he shouldn't, his wife called me a burden because I kept reacting and she said and did other cruel things, I got more and more ill, when I finally spoke up, I was thrown out of the 'sent to by God family', I didn't recover, and the very long and seemingly unsuccesful complaint has left me very close to insanity in that I have been tempted to commit violence towards these people and have been verbally abusive, but this is because they have done all this and not only walked away, but called me a liar. Violence is something that frightens me, I am not violent, but to see these people still respected church leaders and calling me a liar is too much, my life has been devastated by them and they calmly say that I made it up, I couldn't possibly do that, I am no angel, I have been exceedingly nasty because of the way they have treated me, but I have not lied. Nor am I just a user. Nor have I caused trouble in my current church and housgroup that I go to and love despite losing God.
They took my dream of being part of a family and rubbished it, and me, they damaged a longstanding friendship when the Churchwarden phoned my friend when he heard about the complaint, and told my friend that he had been doing 'sexual therapy' on me to 'cure my problems', he got this friend, who was the worst possible person to be involved, and I lost that friend. Please do not let this man get away with the injustices he has done. He was dismissed as church secretary from his previous church because he overstepped boundaries, as he did with me. I had no interest in sex with him, and kept fending him off.
He hurt me a lot with things he said and did other than sexual things, and the things his wife said hurt me every day so I cant recover, I have no access to therapy due to costs, so I am living in an utter nightmare, the police locked me up to stop me commiting suicide the other week, and I am claustrophobic, so the added terror of that has really left me beyond help.
With all of my heart, Your Grace, I am crying out to you for help and recompense, this man should not be representing God or you, he took God from me, I cant worship his God, I loved God so much and God has gone, taken by this man and his wife and I am looked upon as something repulsive by the churches, it is a small community, people know what is going on, the complaint was not taken seriously by the Dean, the police couldn't prosecute because this man didn't get as far as sexual intercourse with me and there so wasn't enough evidence for them, but my complaint is truthful and being called a liar by these people while I am this ill must be an abomination to God, wherever God has gone, I try to pray but I am silent because He is so far away, and if He condones their actions and allows this in His name, then how can I love Him or believe in Him?
I appeal to the Bishop, firstly to be merciful and look at this matter again, secondly I really am at the end because of this, and I will go to hell when I die because God has been taken from me and I am raging mad, is there a priest who can help me, please.
Your grace, I affirm in front of God, who I still want to believe in, that what I have said in my complaint is true, in front of God the Father and Jesus, His Son and in His name, what I have told you is true, please have mercy and look at my complaint again, the way I write things looks fantastical because I am disabled and with many things wrong because my soul is destroyed, I am violently angry, which is against God, but the people who hurt me have separated me from God so much and they have made me out to be liar and a troublemaker, I am nasty because the things they did took the last of my hope and I am in despair. Please I appeal to you and to God, don't let these people go on running that church and saying that I have been untruthful.
I am appealing to the Bishop of Winchester for help again.
Earlier this year I wrote with concerns regarding a Churchwarden and his wife,
this couple have hurt me very badly, the churchwarden by using sexuality on me as well as playing emotional games, and his wife by saying and shouting some terrible things, they have almost literally driven me mad, I am autistic and have behavioural problems, and because of what happened I am out of control and also very ill with disturbed sleep and nightmares, severe concentration problems, which led to a car crash which hasn't helped, and I am now unable to work, I am very very distressed.
My concerns that I sent to you were being handled by Jane Fisher, but I have just been told through another person that all that is being done is that the Churchwarden is being asked not to work with vulnerable people unsupervised.
I am astounded that this information was given to someone else, not me, am I mistaken, why did this happen?? Is this man really allowed to go on running a church after what he did to me? This evening he called me a liar in front of people, and tried to get people from a church that I have worshipped at since to be witnesses to me losing my temper, I am being criminalised for what this man did to me, yet he is representing God and the Church and I have lost my faith in God, which was my light and hope in the darkness of multiple disabilities and poverty, he abused me, the depth of the damage is hard to explain, but I prayed to God for a family to belong to, because I am disabled and alone, this man brought me into his family, told me that 'God had told him to take me as a daughter' and he regressed me so I was like a child, then he talked sex to me and did things he shouldn't, his wife called me a burden because I kept reacting and she said and did other cruel things, I got more and more ill, when I finally spoke up, I was thrown out of the 'sent to by God family', I didn't recover, and the very long and seemingly unsuccesful complaint has left me very close to insanity in that I have been tempted to commit violence towards these people and have been verbally abusive, but this is because they have done all this and not only walked away, but called me a liar. Violence is something that frightens me, I am not violent, but to see these people still respected church leaders and calling me a liar is too much, my life has been devastated by them and they calmly say that I made it up, I couldn't possibly do that, I am no angel, I have been exceedingly nasty because of the way they have treated me, but I have not lied. Nor am I just a user. Nor have I caused trouble in my current church and housgroup that I go to and love despite losing God.
They took my dream of being part of a family and rubbished it, and me, they damaged a longstanding friendship when the Churchwarden phoned my friend when he heard about the complaint, and told my friend that he had been doing 'sexual therapy' on me to 'cure my problems', he got this friend, who was the worst possible person to be involved, and I lost that friend. Please do not let this man get away with the injustices he has done. He was dismissed as church secretary from his previous church because he overstepped boundaries, as he did with me. I had no interest in sex with him, and kept fending him off.
He hurt me a lot with things he said and did other than sexual things, and the things his wife said hurt me every day so I cant recover, I have no access to therapy due to costs, so I am living in an utter nightmare, the police locked me up to stop me commiting suicide the other week, and I am claustrophobic, so the added terror of that has really left me beyond help.
With all of my heart, Your Grace, I am crying out to you for help and recompense, this man should not be representing God or you, he took God from me, I cant worship his God, I loved God so much and God has gone, taken by this man and his wife and I am looked upon as something repulsive by the churches, it is a small community, people know what is going on, the complaint was not taken seriously by the Dean, the police couldn't prosecute because this man didn't get as far as sexual intercourse with me and there so wasn't enough evidence for them, but my complaint is truthful and being called a liar by these people while I am this ill must be an abomination to God, wherever God has gone, I try to pray but I am silent because He is so far away, and if He condones their actions and allows this in His name, then how can I love Him or believe in Him?
I appeal to the Bishop, firstly to be merciful and look at this matter again, secondly I really am at the end because of this, and I will go to hell when I die because God has been taken from me and I am raging mad, is there a priest who can help me, please.
Your grace, I affirm in front of God, who I still want to believe in, that what I have said in my complaint is true, in front of God the Father and Jesus, His Son and in His name, what I have told you is true, please have mercy and look at my complaint again, the way I write things looks fantastical because I am disabled and with many things wrong because my soul is destroyed, I am violently angry, which is against God, but the people who hurt me have separated me from God so much and they have made me out to be liar and a troublemaker, I am nasty because the things they did took the last of my hope and I am in despair. Please I appeal to you and to God, don't let these people go on running that church and saying that I have been untruthful.
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